My dad taught me a powerful communication tip

My dad taught me a simple communication tip when I was 18. I still use it till this day.

Here's a quick backstory.

When I moved away to go to college, my dad would routinely send me emails.

Sometimes the emails were personal, sometimes he'd find an interesting article he wanted me to read.

As a new kid starting undergrad, I was too busy (more like lazy) to respond back.

One day he calls me and says:

• "Son, even if you don't have time to write back a thoughtful response, I want you to write back saying: "Dad, acknowledging your message, I'll respond within 2 days"

This bring me to communication tip #1: Acknowledge the sender asap.

Let me explain.

As a busy leader chances are you get a ton of email. Some of this email requires time to think. Time, you don't have in that moment.

So what do you do? You make the sender wait.

Instead of making the other party wait while you think of your response, respond asap with:

• "Hi there, just wanted to acknowledge your message and let you know I'll get back to you no later than X days."

I have a good feeling the other person will appreciate your timely message. I know my dad certainly does.

Communication tip #2 comes from 'Hacks' (One of my favorite shows on HBO. I promise, no spoilers)

Here's the back story:

Deborah Vance is a very successful comedian who finally gets a shot at hosting her own late night show after 50 years.

During rehearsals she starts experiencing stage fright. Here's the advice she gets to overcome her fear:

• "Pick one person in the audience and do the show just for them".

Here's how this advice applies to you.

Next time you're feeling nervous because you need to present to a group of senior leaders, pick one leader that you have good rapport with and imagine they're the only one in the room.

Too often we do the opposite, we only focus on the leader who makes us nervous, or the one who's the most senior in the room.

We almost have an inner dialog with ourself. Something like: "Is he listening?" "Is he checked out?" "Am I even making sense?"

This is only natural but in doing so we also forget that we might also have a champion in the room, who wants to hear what we have to say. Your goal is to find your champion and give them a great experience.

As someone who teaches people for a living, I've followed this technique for years and it works great.

Communication tip #3: Do an emotional proof read

Imagine its Sunday night and you get a meeting invite from your boss. The subject line says:

• "Feedback re: client presentation"

I'll bet a $100, your brain is going to create all sorts of doom and gloom scenarios.

Why?

Because text has a "negativity bias". We typically assume the worst when we don't have proper context.

So how do you beat the negativity bias?

In addition to doing a spell check, do an emotional proof-read before sending out important communication to your team.

One way to do this is by adding more (clear) context to your emails, slack, and meeting invites so your employee doesn't misinterpret them.

Notice the difference below:

The difference is self-explanatory. The invite without any context is going to freak your people out. The second invite might still make your employee a bit nervous but at least they'll know what to expect.

My hope for you is to keep improving how you're communicating with the word.

Learning to acknowledge promptly, finding a friendly face in the conference room or Zoom and proof-reading your text will not just help you become a better communicator, it'll also help you become a better leader.

Keep leading!

Ali